Illustration by:  

Rachel Eppy

You will find this quite funny, I’m perfectly sure,

So if you’re ready to listen, I’ll tell you some more.

    On Monday this week a big spider was stealing

    Quietly and stealthily high up on the ceiling.

 

The first one to notice was Christopher Trudge,

Who then gave his neighbour, Ben Ridley, a nudge.

    As both of them stared at the ceiling above,

    Another boy noticed them – Anthony Love.

 

He nudged his neighbour who then raised his eyes,

For it looked like their teacher might have a surprise.

    The spider, it seemed, now decided instead,

    To travel down swiftly on a long silky thread.

 

By now, other children had noticed this too,

But nobody knew what on earth they should do.

    It’s hard to contain a giggle, you’ll know,

    And the spider knew just where it wanted to go.

 

Suspended and waiting it planned where to land

Whilst hung in the air still attached to its strand.

    Then with grace and with poise it came gently to rest

    On our teacher’s bald head, as you probably guessed.

 

As the spider moved quietly across his bald patch,

Up went his hand and he started to scratch.

    The spider, of course, didn’t want to be hurt,

    So it ran down his neck and then into his shirt.  

 

Its small tickling feet must have touched the right spot

For poor Mr Lightfoot looked flustered and hot.

    He fled with embarrassment out of the door,

    Whilst we laughed and we laughed as never before.

 

The school bell then went, so we trooped out to play,

But what fun we’d had in our maths class that day.

    Mr Lightfoot recovered, but I have the sure feeling

    That before future lessons, he will glance at the ceiling.

 

Copyright on all my poems

FUNNY POEMS FOR CHILDREN

 

By Josie Whitehead

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