Funny Poems

In a quiet English village, the sun shone on high

And neighbours called greetings to those passing by.

    Children sang songs; even dogs were at peace,

    And nobody ever called out the Police.

 

Love and companionship - freedom from strife!

To the rest of the world it seemed a good life.

    But, sadly, tranquillity was not meant to be

    For something occurred as you shortly will see.

 

On a Wednesday things changed - they remember it well -

When out of the blue came a neighbour from Hell.

    “She’s a real dragon woman” one neighbour complained -

    And at first it was funny and they were entertained.

 

But the laughing soon stopped and the crying began,

And the one who wept most was the “dragon’s” poor man.

    She screamed at her husband from morning to night.

    How on earth had his life got into this plight?

 

She was a blustering, bossy, belligerent beast,

And you’d shudder with shock at the language released.

    The poor frightened man flinched from verbal abuse,

    But trying to calm her was no earthly use.

 

Overbearing, offensive, dictatorial and loud,

Pugnacious, contentious, offensive and proud!

     With her nagging and niggling she annoyed one and all.

     At the least little thing she would bellow and bawl.

 

So whatever became of this dragon from Hell?

Did the villagers manage to bid her farewell?

    Well the shouting and screaming affected her heart.

    In the midst of one rage came her time to depart.

 

In the village, once more, tranquillity reigns –

“And the husband who’d borne the brunt of the strain?”

    Well his life quickly changed for he found a new calling:

    He’s a monk in closed orders - well rid of her bawling.

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FUNNY POEMS

For Secondary Schools 

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